Exasperated

I am exasperated with myself.
I can't stand myself.
I hate it when you don't want something.
Buut then, you kind of realize you do?
Maybe a little?
Like a little?
And then the what ifs drive you crazy.
Drive me bananas.
Like Gwen Stefani.
I hate it.
I hate not being realistic.
I hate not being level-headed.
I hate it when I let my mind wonder and then it comes crashing down.
Because I make it come crashing down.
I hate fairy tales.
Really I do.
I think I overthink a lot.
I think I need to stop overthinking.
I read this book on a girl who overthinks.
She fared pretty well.
Though it was a romantic book.
And I did want to break it in half.
But whatever.
It wasn't that bad.
Back when I read it in the seventh grade.
I always say, I will never dream.
I will not be a dreamer.
It works until it doesn't.
Then, it sucks.
Like right now.
Except not so much, writing has helped.
So much.